tcp: avoid call to soisconnected() on transition to ESTABLISHED

This call existed since pre-FreeBSD times, and it is hard to understand
why it was there in the first place. After 6f3caa6d815 it definitely
became necessary always and commit message from f1ee30ccd60 confirms that.
Now that 6f3caa6d815 is effectively backed out by 07285bb4c22, the call
appears to be useful only for sockets that landed on the incomplete queue,
e.g. sockets that have accept_filter(9) enabled on them.

Provide a new TCP flag to mark connections that are known to be on the
incomplete queue, and call soisconnected() only for those connections.

Reviewed by: rrs, tuexen
Differential revision: https://reviews.freebsd.org/D36488