Use rw_tryupgrade() in dmu_bonus_hold_by_dnode()

When dn->dn_bonus == NULL, dmu_bonus_hold_by_dnode() will unlock its
read lock on dn->dn_struct_rwlock and grab a write lock. This can be
micro-optimized by calling rw_tryupgrade().

Linux will not benefit from this since it does not support rwlock
upgrades, but FreeBSD will.

Reviewed-by: Ryan Moeller <ryan@iXsystems.com>
Reviewed-by: Brian Behlendorf <behlendorf1@llnl.gov>
Reviewed-by: Brian Atkinson <batkinson@lanl.gov>
Signed-off-by: Richard Yao <richard.yao@alumni.stonybrook.edu>
Closes #14517